


look for the girl with the broken smile

by forcynics



Series: vampire diaries ficathon fills [10]
Category: The Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: F/F, Grief, Pining, Pre-Series, References to parental death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-03-30
Updated: 2011-03-30
Packaged: 2018-05-24 04:22:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6141361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/forcynics/pseuds/forcynics
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Elena's parents die, Caroline doesn't know how to be there for her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	look for the girl with the broken smile

 

 

 

Elena used to be more _fun_.  
  
Caroline knows how awful and insensitive that sounds, but it doesn’t stop her from missing the girl her friend _used_ to be. She gets it, she honestly does, how much it sucks when something happens to your family, when everything changes. Her dad left her mom for his new _boy_ friend, and if that’s not all kinds of screwed up, she doesn’t know what is.  
  
She made up for it by throwing herself into every social club at school, putting on short dresses, curling her hair, and flirting with the cutest boys in Mystic Falls. She smiles, and acts like everything’s just fine, and hopes that one day she can convince herself too.  
  
  
  
  
Elena doesn’t smile.  
  
Elena withdraws from the world, spends days in her bedroom, and when she does emerge she makes no pretence at having the energy – or desire – for any of the distractions Caroline suggests – _“I just bought this awesome nail-polish, it’ll look great on you”... “There’s a party at the Lockwoods’ and Tyler says he’s gonna get a keg”_... or even just _“It’s so nice out, come on, let’s go soak up the sun!”_  
  
No, Elena isn’t interested in any of these things. Elena snaps at her friend when she gets frustrated and says she’s not in the mood for any of it.  
  
She doesn’t say "I’m not in the mood for _you,"_ but Caroline thinks that’s implied.  
  
Elena doesn’t want to paint her toe-nails or go get drunk or work on her tan. And she knows it’s because of what happened, because Elena isn’t ready to just go out and have a great time, but she feels hurt too, because those are things they always do in the summer and she’s never felt like they were childish or silly until now.  
  
  
  
  
But she gets it, alright?  
  
She just misses her friend. She misses the way Elena used to laugh all the time, that laugh she always endearingly told her was _so weird_ ; she misses how her nose would get all scrunched up when she grinned; she misses the party girl who was always so affectionate when drunk, pressing kisses to Caroline’s cheeks, lips, and smiling at her with that look in her eyes that said _Shh_.  
  
She misses calling her out with a laugh for borrowing tops and skirts and not returning them for months; she misses giggling nervously as they snuck out during sleepovers; she misses the girl who was there for there when her dad left, who hugged her close and kissed her head and made her feel like it was going to be okay – she misses _her_ Elena, the one she knows how to act around, the one she knows better than anyone else, the one she’s known her whole life.  
  
_This_ Elena is sad and grieving and Caroline wants to make her feel like it’s going to somehow be okay, now that it’s her turn to be there for her friend, but she just doesn’t know how. Her attempts backfire and putter out, she says the wrong things, she’s useless when it matters the most and it makes her wince. She doesn’t know how to act around this Elena and she hates it.  
  
This Elena is serious, quiet, and – Caroline thinks – darker on the inside. Elena Gilbert was always one of those girls who boys looked at right away when she walked into a room, always had that special spark that made Caroline so damn jealous time and time again – but she’d give anything for Elena to have it back.  
  
After all, she always looked too.

  


 

 

 


End file.
